I haven’t posted in a long while, primarily because I’ve slowed my art making way down. And I’m happy with that.
As 2022 wound down, I finished the second in my new Portals series. Technically, I finished it on January 1, 2023, but let’s not quibble about dates. đ
Portals 2: Intuition Hand painted with acrylic paint on commercial fabric, raw edge fused applique, densely machine stitched.
I’m enjoying this new direction I’ve taken with acrylic paint on fabric to create an initial design, then adding my fused applique bits, and finally applying my signature dense machine stitching.
To remind my visitors and viewers, in recent years, Iâve released timelines and deadlines and expectations. Iâve relaxed into my opportunities to create because Iâve let go of the need to be creative all.the.time.
And in the letting go, I find my Light is freed up to better listen to my intuition and follow it where it leads. In this case, it led to this new Portal, a view for you into my intuition. đ
With joy and easeâŠ
Come back and visit in several months and I’m sure I’ll have a new Portal to share. See you then!
Interested in my art, my writing, my poetry, or learning more about bringing consistent joy and ease into your life? Then letâs talk!
Contact me to schedule: * A virtual coffee * A private (virtual) art show of my art * A commissioning conversation to discuss hiring me to create a textured fiber painting uniquely yours
If you enjoyed this art piece and the essay, and it feels aligned, please share on social media or via email. If you liked it, someone you know will probably like it too!
Portals 1: Cosmos Hand painted with acrylic paint on commercial fabric, raw edge fused applique, densely machine stitched.
This new direction Iâm going â painting on fabric, adding my fused applique bits, continuing with my signature dense machine stitching â is really enjoyable. Even if this piece took many months to create.
To be clear, it was the stitching that took a while, not the design. The design piece is always something that comes together in a short period of time for me.
Iâm not complaining about how long Cosmos took to finish. Iâve released timelines and deadlines and expectations. Iâve relaxed into my opportunities to create because Iâve let go of the need to be creative all.the.time.
And in the letting go, I find my Light is freed up to better listen to my intuition and follow it where it leads.
With joy and easeâŠ
Iâll continue to create, as it calls me, following this new direction. I think the next Portal will be filled with bright color. Iâll share it as it comes alive.
Interested in my art, my writing, my poetry, or learning more about bringing consistent joy and ease into your life? Then letâs talk!
Contact me to schedule: * A virtual coffee * A private (virtual) art show of my art * A commissioning conversation to discuss hiring me to create a textured fiber painting uniquely yours
If you enjoyed this art piece and the essay, and it feels aligned, please share on social media or via email. If you liked it, someone you know will probably like it too!
I came across a post on Facebook a while ago, about taking your power back, about not allowing others to make you feel small or less than or anything other than the glorious human you are. (Sometimes, Facebook delivers really good stuff.)
This post had gone viral, which is how I found it. I read it. It resonated. Especially this line: âI am a dragon, and I am ancient and experienced.â That line leapt off the screen at me – BAM! – because Iâm growing older each day and Iâm always learning, which translates into experience and it made me smile to picture myself as a mighty dragon.
And while smiling in my imagined dragon form, my mind turned to judgment.
I work every day to be as non-judgmental as possible. I donât do this because I follow some religious practice that says judgment is a sin. I donât do this because Iâm trying to be holy. (Iâm not. Iâm so far from it, itâs laughable).
I do this because itâs what feels right to me, what I believe defines me as an individual and allows me to live a more beautiful life.
I work at non-judgment but every day, I fail. In reality, I fail miserably, often.
I find myself caught up in judgment through gossip, through anger, through attempts to cooperate which go no where, through a lack of knowledge or discernment or patience.
Every time I fail, I learn. I was going to say Iâm pleased to fail because thatâs how I learn, but thatâs a judgment too, so instead, Iâll stress the value of the learning from those moments when I fall into judgment.
I have friends and acquaintances, co-workers and colleagues, across the many tentacles of the political spectrum, the gender spectrum, the color spectrum, and more. All of them are individuals on the HUMAN spectrum.
I am grateful for the opportunity to know these people, to follow them and listen to the messages that come from their hearts, the messages that define them. Because in knowing, following, listening, I am given the gift of spiritual growth.
But this is also the area where I work hardest to release all judgment. I may not always understand an individual or collective position, belief, stance. Each states what is true for that individual and I may cock my head to the side in curiosity or confusion – because it contradicts what I grew up believing or what society has dictated for years or it pokes at something deep inside me to make me uncomfortable (ah, thereâs a lesson there!).
This curiosity or confusion or uncomfortableness is why itâs the area where I work the hardest. To borrow from someone far wiser than I, we are spiritual beings having a human experience. And Spirit does not judge. Only humans do.
We are the same as much as we are different. We come from the same place. We return to the same place. There is no Heaven. There is no Hell. The human experience encompasses both; they arenât places to go when we close our eyes for the final time.
We release our humanness when we die and return to Spirit, which has been with us all along. Itâs a Truth that no one gets out alive. So why not use our human time to learn as much as we can? Why not use our human time to be as close to our Spirit selves as possible?
So even if Iâm still curious or confused or uncomfortable after following and listening, I always straighten my head back on my neck and nod – in solidarity and respect for what makes you, you. I donât know what youâve experienced. I havenât lived your life. I can only live mine, so I choose to refrain from judgment and instead seek greater understanding.
I am an individual, just as you are. I choose to work on being non-judgmental as my path to learning whatever it is I came into this human experience to learn. Thereâs joy in non-judgment. Thereâs ease. And thereâs so much incredible light.
With joy and easeâŠ
I may not always understand but I am always willing to listen and learn and grow, so if you need a person who wonât judge you for what makes you, you, Iâm here. And if that helps you to take your power back, all the better.
xo
Interested in my art, my writing, my poetry, or learning more about bringing consistent joy and ease into your life? Then letâs talk!
Contact me to schedule: * A virtual coffee * A private (virtual) art show of my art * A commissioning conversation to discuss hiring me to create a textured fiber painting uniquely yours
If you enjoyed this essay, and it feels aligned, please share on social media or via email. If you liked it, someone you know will probably like it too!
What if the work youâre paid to do isnât the real work? What if, instead, the real work is the work you do to grow and evolve, and all the rest is lesson?
That was the response I received during a recent meditation session. This essay shares my thoughts on that response.
Tree of LifeâŠthe stitching continues
Before I get into what I discovered, I want to touch on the fact that, these days, Iâm artist who is rarely making art, a writer rarely writing, and a poet rarely waxing lyrical. I am still a joy and ease believer, though. Thatâs not ever going to change again.
After two years of self-employment, which included one year of pandemic-enforced isolation, Iâm learning I donât have as much energy at the end of the work day as I did pre-entrepreneurship. I come home from work to cook dinner. By the time weâre done with our evening meal, Iâm spent. I sit to relax for a bit and find myself promptly falling asleep on the couch. This doesnât leave a lot of room for art or word crafting. So I released my expectations for weekdays and instead, focus my attention on my art and my words on the weekends. Itâs taking me much longer to create my art or revise my novel than it would if I spent a tiny bit of time on them each day. This was making me feel guilty, like I was cheating myself, because I had this image in my mind that my art and my words are what Iâm meant to do.
Which is why I asked the question I asked in my meditation.
As I sit in stillness and breath to center myself for my daily meditation practice, I always ask a question, sent silently up the line to my Higher Self and my Spirit Crew. In the session Iâm talking about today, my question was: What is my real work?
I asked this because of my art and word crafting expectation for myself I mentioned above. I also asked this because, while I am enjoying my return to corporate life in construction management, it has a lot of challenges. Thereâs a toxicity to this project I havenât experienced in quite a while, which can make it difficult to connect to the work. Iâm also missing the time when I worked for myself. These conflicts can create resentment if I allow it. As a result, Iâm always consciously seeking a balance between the freedom of my dream of entrepreneurship so I can spend time with my art and my words and the freedom of a steady paycheck.
So I asked âWhat is my real work?â The answer I received came as a statement, not as the questions I posed at the beginning of this essay (those questions are for you to ask yourself). The download went something like this:
Your real work is the work you do ON yourself, not something you do outside yourself. The work is growth, evolution, personal expansion. It is not paycheck work, or hobby-turned-income work. Every experience youâve had has been an opportunity for growth, to navigate challenge, to overcome hurdle, to create solution. Every experience, from childhood to adulthood presented lessons to learn so you could grow. Your job is necessary because it presents challenges that allow you to connect to yourself. Working for yourself, and releasing it, was necessary to discover you do not thrive in isolation, even as an introvert. Making your art, writing your novel, the experience of your youth – all present lessons for your growth regardless of how much time you spend with them. The real work is your work. The real work is you and the choices you make while in your human form. The real work is love and light and joy, discovering this higher energy in all things. Your real work is not the definition of work. Your real work is to evolve. Embrace every experience, the easy but especially the hard, as part of your work. Use your rest time and quiet time to process these experiences. This is where you grow. This is your work.
This message fills me with gratitude. It helps me to find balance in my feelings when they veer from one extreme to another. It helps me to better understand why my art practice has slowed down. It helps me to navigate my way through low energy environments while maintaining my own high energy view. This message helps.
Prior to returning to corporate work, my art was the way and the place I processed and learned. Over the last 5 years, Iâve created feelings out of fiber, which allowed me to better understand emotion as I turned a feeling into a tangible work of art. That work will continue but at a slower pace because Iâve entered a different learning phase. Now, Iâm learning from my job how best Iâm meant to grow.
That doesnât mean Iâll quit making my art or writing my words. Iâll just do it on weekends, releasing all expectations for anything other than the joy of creating. Iâm still working on my Tree of Life piece, slowly stitching to add texture to the piece. Once Iâve finished it, Iâll move on to the next textured fiber painting. Maybe, like the Tree of Life, Iâll play with paint on fabric. Maybe Iâll create another feeling. Maybe Iâll create something totally different. Iâll know what I want to create when the time comes.
Because everything I experience, from working a job to making dinner to creating art carries lessons that lead to growth. That is my real work.
What is yours?
With joy and easeâŠ
xo
Interested in my art, my writing, my poetry, or learning more about bringing consistent joy and ease into your life? Then letâs talk!
Contact me to schedule: * A virtual coffee * A private (virtual) art show of my art * A commissioning conversation to discuss hiring me to create a textured fiber painting uniquely yours
If you enjoyed this essay, and it feels aligned, please share on social media or via email. If you liked it, someone you know will probably like it too!
Art making is not going according to plan. And Iâm working on being okay with that.
Me, working on being okay with things not going according to plan. Itâs a process.
When I last wrote an essay here, it was mid-June and I finally had my studio put together. I was excited to get back into art making, to dive into the stitching phase on my Tree of Life piece Iâd begun before we relocated from Florida.
Iâm still excited, however, Iâve found myself having to temper that excitement so I donât beat myself up over not meeting my own expectations for myself and my art practice.
Iâd forgotten how much energy it takes to work outside the home for someone else. Iâd forgotten how much energy I absorb from others after a year of pandemic-induced isolation. Iâd forgotten how much stress itâs possible to feel when youâre an empath and everyone around you is stressed.
I come home each night from work, worn out, exhausted. Prepping dinner takes what little energy I have left over, leaving none for weeknight studio time.
This disappoints me. When I worked outside the home before my two years of self-employment, I always had energy when the day ended. I always took at least 15 minutes to work in my studio – because itâs amazing how much art one can make #15minutesatatime. And I was satisfied. I met my own expectations for what I wanted my art practice to look like.
Now, Iâm having to redefine those expectations. We have space constraints at work. Iâm in a cubicle for the first time in 20 years because of those space constraints â almost no one has an office to themselves. Thereâs so much noise and constant activity, I find myself frequently distracted and not nearly as productive as Iâm accustomed to being. This environmental impact to my energy is fierce.
But Iâm not complaining. Instead, Iâm focused on ways to protect my energy while still being engaged in my work. The more I can protect my energy, the more I can conserve it, the more Iâll have left over to play with my art each evening.
One way Iâm doing this is through noise cancelling ear buds. These will help to create boundaries for myself in the office. I used them over the holiday weekend at home, while stitching on my Tree of Life. When I finally removed them, I was almost startled to hear music coming from the stereo the Big Guy had turned on while he did projects around the house.
Stitching on âTree of Lifeâ â slow and steady with metallic thread in whatever time I have available
Another way I protect my energy is through meditation. I already meditate each morning before leaving the house for work. Iâm looking into meditations suitable for driving for my commute home, something to bring me back to myself, back to my heart, so I can release whatever energy Iâve absorbed during the day, and return to my innate joy and ease. And if I canât find a guided meditation that suits, then Iâll crank up the music and let it flow over me.
Iâve also plugged studio time into my calendar, a 15 minute appointment with myself and my art each evening after work, which allows me to reserve energy for that time. I may not make every appointment, but scheduling time into my day reminds me of the importance of engaging with my creativity. Because I keep my expectation small â #15minutesatatime â itâs easier to meet and it allows me to stick to my plan. (If you havenât figured it out by now, the right and left sides of my brain are constantly working together. Within the structure of a plan, I have space to experiment and freely create.)
Finally, Iâm reminding myself Iâm made of magic, as are we all. We are magic and Spirit, choosing to live in human form to experience and learn and grow, to evolve. This current situation, where I find myself looking for ways to better protect my energy when things donât go according to plan, is just one more lesson to learn. And maybe, as I share my own learning, youâll find ways to evolve too.
With joy and easeâŠ
If youâre someone like me, who finds themselves needing to protect their energy when things donât go according to plan, what do you do to bring yourself back to yourself?
Iâd love to know. Please drop a comment below or send me a DM and letâs have a conversation – together, we may find just the solution you need.
xo
Interested in my art, my writing, my poetry, or learning more about bringing consistent joy and ease into your life? Then letâs talk!
Contact me to schedule: * A virtual coffee * A private (virtual) art show of my art * A commissioning conversation to discuss hiring me to create a textured fiber painting uniquely yours
If you enjoyed this essay, and it feels aligned, please share on social media or via email. If you liked it, someone you know will probably like it too!
Hilary Clark Studios 